Yevgeny Ruslanovich Kolpakov

Member of Uralican Tribal Council
Assumed office
18 March 2008

Secretary of the Uralicist Movement
In office
1 January 2008 – 18 March 2008
Preceded by Meri Vanhanen

Chair of the Department of Political Science, Uralikan Yliopisto
Assumed office
1 April 2008

Born 22 April 1959
Soviet Union Zvenigovo (Mari El), Soviet Union
Spouse Maria Kolpakova
Children Mikhail, Matvey, and Yaroslav Kolpakov; Martina and Kseniya Kolpakova
Alma mater Leningrad State University
Religion Uralican Evangelical Baptist Christian

Dr. Yevgeny Ruslanovich Kolpakov (b. 22 April 1959 in Zvenigovo (now Provoi), USSR) is a Uralican Mari political theorist, politician, and activist, one of the founding fathers of Uralica, one of twenty Tribal Council members that have never failed to be voted in, and the patriarch of one of Uralica's most famous families. He also chairs the Department of Political Science at Uralikan Yliopisto, and is de facto Vice-Dean of the Faculty of Social Sciences.

Biography Edit

Born to a Mari factory worker named Ruslan and a Russian bureaucrat named Ivanka, Yevgeny's childhood and adolescence were fairly low-key, save for the fact that his marks were good enough for full scholarship at the prestigious Leningrad State University (as it was known then). He got a reputation as something of a daydreamer when he was young, and this developed into a certain philosophical mindset that would determine much of his life. He did a double-major in Political Science and Philosophy, but the latter would lead him into some "digging" which led him to find books on philosophies outside the Soviet world.

During his time at LSU, he met his future wife, Maria Diakonova, a full-blooded Mari from Yoshkar-Ola, who majored in Philosophy. He was drawn to her striking looks and caring character, while she admired his intelligence and insight, and she admitted later that she thought he was handsome.

They had a fairly nondescript wedding at home in Mari El in February of 1982, the year after they both graduated. So well-known was Yevgeny that certain high-ranking Soviets insisted on invitation, but these were, surprisingly, declined. There was a reason for this, as both husband and wife had secretly converted to Orthodox Christianity, a major taboo in Communist Russia. Because of his "digging," Yevgeny had discovered an old Russian Bible and read it from cover to cover - only Maria knew of it, and she too would read it alongside him.

Leonid Brezhnev's death was literally one day before the birth of their eldest child, Martina Yevgeniyevna Kolpakova, in Yoshkar-Ola. It wasn't until after the birth of their second child, Mikhail Yevgeniyevich Kolpakov, in May of 1984, that Yevgeny decided to go back to school again, and by that time, Soviet politics seemed to be in a funk, so he avoided the major centres and instead went to the University of Tartu in the Estonian SSR, where he did a Master of Arts degree in Comparative Politics. His insights wowed his professors, especially when he actually did an objective comparison of Soviet communism, other forms of communism, and capitalism, explaining the pros and cons of all three so well that some worried he was a threat to the regime.

Tired of the "backstabbing" he endured while in Tartu, the moment Gorbachev opened the borders for Soviet students to go abroad, he was gone. Because of his Uralic heritage, he went to Finland, specifically the University of Helsinki, to finish his degree. The fact that Meadow Mari was his mother tongue, and what he had learned of Estonian in Tartu, made learning Finnish that much easier. It made him take an extra six months to complete his Master's, but he graduated at the end of 1986, having finished coursework during the summer. The following June, his third child and second son, Matvey (who would later go on to become quite famous in his own right) was born.

Having heard about his objectivism and insights, a great many schools from around the world with solid political science programs sent him offers of grants if he chose to get his doctorate at their school. Desiring a change of scenery, he opted for Cambridge, although he had to spend an extra year just to get his English up to an appropriate level. The research he did was so extensive that he didn't graduate until 1990 - by then, he had sired another daughter, Kseniya, who was the only Kolpakov not born in Russia, having been born at an airline stopover point in Hamburg, Germany. Maria had to postpone the second half of her flight for an entire month, which took a lot of manoeuvring on Yevgeny's part. This was in October of 1989.

Upon receiving his DPhil in 1990, he had been invited to become a professor at Moscow State University, so the whole family moved to Voskresensk, a suburb of Moscow, which is where their youngest child, Yaroslav, was born in 1991, mere months before the failed coup of the USSR. Unlike most Uralicans, Yevgeny can claim he had a hand in stifling this coup because he was in Moscow at the time. He stayed in the city for the three days the coup took place (19-21 August 1991), helping to erect barricades.

After the coup, he finished the semester, then asked for a release from the post so he and his family could move closer to home. Although he wished to return to Yoshkar-Ola, Mari State University had no Political Science program, so while they did indeed move there, he commuted back and forth every day to Kazan', the capital of nearby Tatarstan, and taught Political Science at Kazan' State University.

In the 1998-99 academic year, Kolpakov was notified that Mari State University was to begin a program in International Relations, which required someone with a good grounding in international political studies, and was transferred to the university, which put an end to the costly 2-hour-plus commute. He was given immediate tenure.

Over the next six years, Kolpakov was given accolades for his clarity and objectivity as a professor, but he did garner the university some negative attention when he began speaking out against the oppression of the Mari people by ethnic Russians, even as early as 2001. He began receiving death threats in 2005, but these came to an abrupt end when the Cataclysm caused widespread chaos and destruction. He spent the first weeks of 2006 in mourning for the people of the city of Kazan', which was completely destroyed by a straying nuclear missile.

Out of the ashes of Cataclysm came the rise of Order, as the NPO and Francoism came into the area. The area was later handed over to the New Polar Order, and it was in Polar Francoism that Kolpakov really began to thrive, being asked to travel worldwide and do lectures about Francoist political thought. He would resume his teaching at MSU in April of 2006, and it was during these times that he first met Vaido Kuik, who at the time was a professor at the University of Tartu, and doing academic visits to the area. The two became fast friends.

However, the persecution would resume anew, not long before Great War II, as Uralics were beginning to be seen as untrustworthy because of the actions of a single Karelian who was seen conversing with a League operative. Again he spoke out, simultaneously denouncing the League and those who thought all Uralics were part of it, calling the latter "racists with an imperialistic superiority complex."

Polaris did eventually take notice of these accusations being made, and would keep a close eye on the Uralic-heavy areas of what was once Russia, even those not under their direct control. But their attention was diverted because of the leadup to Great War III, and the real persecution began, with ethnic Uralics coming under heavy pressure. Two of Yevgeny's Mari colleagues were murdered before his eyes, forcing him to take his family and flee north to the much more obscure city of Syktyvkar. This was only part of the mass diaspora from the area, as the city of Yoshkar-Ola alone lost 75% of its population in this mass flight. Furious, he began scouting the local universities for support to "do something about it," and quite by accident ran into Vaido Kuik again, as he was doing a lecture on racism at Syktyvkar State University. Inspired, he went to Vaido after the lecture and talked about forming a protest movement, which Vaido said he already had in mind. Behind him in the queue to talk to Kuik was Meri Vanhanen, a Karelian missionary and counsellor who had fled Petrozavodsk after receiving death threats similar to those he himself had received.

Five days later, a recent colleague of Vaido's from the University of Helsinki, named Lasse Mäkelä, showed up in Syktyvkar to meet these three, and the Uralicist Movement was born. Although he held no official position initially, Yevgeny, and Maria as well, did help out Meri Vanhanen with administrative work.

Kolpakov's displeasure with the persecution of Uralics in general and Mari in particular was voiced more prominently as time went on. He and Ovdey Shlomov organised a mass propaganda campaign that reached tens of millions of ethnic Russians, and, being of the Orthodox Christian faith at the time, his appeal to a relatively young metropolitan named Nikolay Kosov sparked one of the most memorable public Christian decrees of the Robertian Era on 1 July 2007, which led to the near-immediate end of the Uralic Purges.

Although much of the population that had fled Yoshkar-Ola returned, the Kolpakovs did not, remaining in Syktyvkar to help administer the Movement, which was starting to really take off. When Jarkko Salomäki came around in August, he found himself impressed by Yevgeny's ability to debate things objectively, and when he was elected Chair of the Movement in October, he offered Kolpakov the vacant vice-chair position, which he declined. (This eventually went to Vlasi Malenkov.)

Still, Salomäki did his darnedest to get Kolpakov into an official position within the Movement, and by January of 2008, he had convinced the administration-gifted Mari to sit as the Movement's Secretary, replacing a slightly worn-out Meri Vanhanen.

The Syktyvkar Riots were a scary time for Yevgeny and Maria, as their oldest son, Mikhail, got caught up in the fighting, although the worst he suffered was a cut foot on shards of a broken vodka bottle. He had four stitches in his right foot, and still has a scar from the cut. However, the Three-Day Revolution put his, and his family's, mind at ease, and he travelled to Yoshkar-Ola on the third day to peacefully protest the ongoing (albeit reduced) persecution.

Uralica's foundation on 18 March 2008 was a moment of great joy for the Kolpakov family, even though Mari El was not annexed by the nation for another fifteen months. Naturally, when Uralikan Yliopisto began operations the following month, he was excited to start teaching again, and so he signed on, and was quickly made chair of the Department of Political Science, which was always his forté. He has taught there ever since, and his insights into world politics are always appreciated in the Tribal Council.

After the annexation of Mari El in July 2009, Kolpakov returned to Yoshkar-Ola, and teaches at the Kolpakov Campus of Uralikan Yliopisto, which is named after him.

Trivia Edit

  • His five children have all become famous for various reasons: Mikhail is a soldier in the Mindphaser Division, Martina and Kseniya are both models, and Martina also acts, Yaroslav is Uralica's top long-distance runner, and Matvey is a world-renowned ice hockey player, known as "The Mari Gretzky" for his all-around offensive talent.
  • His favourite music is symphonic electronica, and he has a particular fondness for Mika Ukkonen. He also enjoys classical music, particularly the works of J.S. Bach, Tchaikovsky, and Anton Rubenstein.
  • His favourite movie is Through Hellfire and Brimstone, a futuristic horror-action movie starring Uralican action star Pentti Korhonen.
  • He has written eight books on political theory, including five on Francoism and two on Neo-Tribalism. His favourite non-Biblical authors range from Machiavelli to Billy Graham. In terms of fiction, he is a supporter of Mari science fiction author Yelena Tursunova.
  • He converted from Orthodoxy to UEB in 2008 after the Three-Day Revolution, but is still on friendly terms with the now-Patriarch of Uralica, Nikolay Kosov (Patriarch Nikolaos I).
  • His favourite sports are football (soccer) and ice hockey. His favourite teams are HK Syktyvkar and Stolitsa Yoshkar-Ola.
  • His position of "vice-Dean" is only nominal, unless the regular dean, Vlasi Malenkov, cannot fulfill his duties as Dean due to illness or other major trouble. After Malenkov announced he will be stepping down after the Fall 2010 semester, Kolpakov was named as his eventual successor and will take over in January 2011.
  • He speaks nine languages fluently - Eastern Mari (his mother tongue) and also the Western language, Russian, Finnish, English, Estonian, Tatar, French, and Bashkir. He claims he is currently learning the Chuvash language.
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