Whoa! We Won’t Want to Wage War Writ

Independent Republic of Orange Nations
Mostly Harmless Alliance
MHA Small Flag

Treaty Type: ODP
Treaty Signed: 15 February, 2011
Treaty Terminated: 15 April, 2013
Treaty Status: Defunct

Whoa! We Won’t Want to Wage War Writ is an Optional Defense Pact signed between the Independent Republic of Orange Nations and Mostly Harmless Alliance on 15 February 2011.

Text of the Treaty Edit


Article I: Iron swords cannot cut harmless towels, and vice-versa

Contrary to popular belief, MHA and IRON do not like to fight each other. I know you are saying Whoa! They won’t want to wage war against each other anymore!?!?! Deal with it. We are going to remain at peace.

Article II: Pointless article that is in every treaty

Yes, it is the sovereignty article. Duh, of course, we remain sovereign; this is not a merger.

Article IV: We are intelligent, are you?

IRON pledges to be intelligent, MHA pledges to do the same. In being intelligent, we intelligently decided that it would be most intelligent if we shared intelligence in an intelligent fashion.

Article V: Regarding Article III

There is no Article III. It is our agreement; we can number the articles how we want. Oh yeah, and avert your eyes.

Article VI: Iron towels work best

We realize that Iron towels far exceed the power of Iron swords or Harmless towels. One may ask, “How did you discover this?” We will tell you the same thing repeatedly, we discovered it on the battlefield; when we were into fighting each other, two warrior’s weapons collided and formed a super weapon. It was an Iron towel. Acknowledging such, we have decided that it would be best to leave open the option to defend one another, without obligation that is, in order to be able to unleash the fearsome Iron towel when it is needed.

Article VII: Iron towels’ brittleness

Iron towels can be brittle if left unattended. Similarly, any writ regarding war waging is brittle, including the Whoa! We Won’t Want to Wage War Writ. As such, if this writ is left unattended for a period of three months, it falls apart and becomes void.

Article VII+1: If we have the urge to fight each other again

In the unlikely event that IRON wants to fight MHA or MHA wants to fight IRON, then this writ maybe cancelled by giving the other a 48 hour notice.

Article 42: Panicking

Both MHA and IRON don’t panic.

Article W: Signatures

For MHA:


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