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Screaming Red Asses Standard

Screaming Red Asses Standard

War Guidon of the Screaming Red Asses
War Guidon of the Screaming Red Asses

Raup Seal
Raup Seal
SRA Motto:
Gaibhnithe ár n-chonair féin
Team Color Red team Red
Founder(s) Walsh the Beloved
Founded FOUNDED: July 1, 2012
RE-FOUNDED: May 1, 2016
Government

RED ASS COMMANDER:

International relations
TREATIES

LAWYERS, GUNS AND MONEY A list of all current treaties of the Screaming Red Asses is located on the Lawyers, Guns and Money Doctrine page, which delineates their nature, scope and usage.

Suprise One Way Wiki-PIAT

NOTE: In all likelihood, LoSS does not recognize this treaty

NAP
Treaty Details
MAoDP
Treaty Details


WARS

Dave War Image Talvisota Image FrozenChosinImage PEE WEE IMAGE Luzist SuperCereal Image Dre4m W4r Bron-Yr-Aur Stomp (small) Monster Mash Nom Du Jour

WTF War
AllianceStats Statistics as of Today (Click Icon)
Important Links

The Screaming Red Asses (SRA) was founded on July 1, 2012, by Walsh the Beloved as an alliance largely independent of the treaty web. Rebranded as Stripes on August 15, 2015 after the deletion of Walsh the Beloved, it was reformed on May 1, 2016.

Manifesto[]

GAIBHNITHE ÁR RIAN FÉIN

The Screaming Red Asses are a samall alliance, currently residing on the red trading sphere. The Screaming Red Asses are founded on the principles of independence of thought and action, as reflected in the following points:

1) There are good alliances and good rulers on every strand of the treaty web. The Screaming Red Asses shall not let an arbitrary system of interlocking treaties determine with whom they shall befriend or ally themselves. This may or may not cause tensions when hostilities begin; the Red Asses are confident that reason and discussion between good allies can overcome such obstacles. Should the issue be impossible to overcome, perhaps the treaty has run its course. This is neither good nor bad – it simply is.

2) The Screaming Red Asses will not have their foreign policy decisions made by their allies or enemies. If our allies’ loyalty for us is based on who else we befriend, perhaps they are not the allies we are looking for. By the same token, the enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend.

3) The time appears to have come on Planet Bob when blind allegiance is no longer practical nor desirable. Casus Belli are becoming weak and arbitrary, and the Red Asses do not feel compelled to fight a war in which they believe the cause is frivolous or unjust. To that end, all treaties signed by the Red Asses will be ODAP; however, that fails to capture the spirit of the treaty (this policy has since been superceded by the Lawyers, Guns and Money Doctrine). Independence is NOT synonymous with neutrality. The Screaming Red Asses vow to defend their allies when necessary – these treaties will be viewed as mutual by the Red Asses, with the only exception being we will not automatically support an unjust or frivolous CB, or situations in which an ally has clearly committed an action for which it deserves punishment. In fact, better name for such a treaty would be JMDnoAP – Justified Mutual Defense (non-chaining) and Optional Aggression Pact. This is not intended to be weasel or infra-hugging language. Readiness for war, desire for war or economic condition will NOT drive this decision. Our allies are sovereign and are welcome to engage in whatever wars they wish and for whatever reason – the Red Asses, however, cannot be expected to support unwarranted wars of aggression, nor support foreign policy gaffes which are being justly prosecuted on the field of battle. We expect our own CB’s to be judged accordingly – we do not want to drag our allies into any war for a cause they do not believe in.

History[]

A New Alliance[]

The Screaming Red Asses were founded by Walsh the Beloved, most recently of Hooligans, on the principles of independence of thought and action . The Screaming Red Asses formed on July 1, 2012, as a one-man micro and declared their existence the next day, spurred on in large part by the awful nature of casus belli used in the prosecution of the Dave War, which was well underway at the time. Kaskus was chosen as a protector, primarily because of their largely neutral position on the treaty web, and agreed to provide limited protection in the form of an ODP, which was the subject of some debate amongst their ranks. The Red Asses wasted no time putting their philosophies into action, and before they were 24 hours old, they had done something many alliances had already done (entered the Dave War), and something else many alliances had not (entered the conflict on both sides).

Dave War
Dave War Image
Date July 2, 2012 - July 24, 2012
Result
Cease Fire
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Nuclearfire

Nuclear Fire


Echelonflag2
Echelon


Flag of PPO
Pirates of the Parrot Order

GPFFlag
Global Protection Force

Argentnukesymbol6

Argent
RIBBONS ISSUED
Campaign Nuclear Fire

Nuclear Fire Expeditionary Medal

ribbon name
Echelon Campaign Ribbon

ribbon name
PPO Campaign Ribbon

ribbon name
GPF Campaign Ribbon

ribbon name

Argent Campaign Ribbon

TIMELINE



MAIN WIKI PAGE: DAVE WAR

The Dave War[]

The Screaming Red Asses fought on three distinct fronts on two sides of the treaty web in the Dave War. Each front had its own casus belli, unique challenges, and different comportment. These fronts are detailed below:

The Nuclear Fire Front[]

The first front of the Dave War was against the rogue alliance Nuclear Fire in defense of The Apparatus. It was felt by the Red Asses that, in a war rife with the some of the most unworthy CB's to date, The Apparatus had the best DoW while Nuclear Fire had the worst. It was largely a war of principle, as Nuclear Fire had only one nation in range, and that nation's slots were filled by NpO as quickly as they opened. Still, the Red Asses supplied The Biohazard Corporation and Bull Moose with financial aid to carry on the war. For this reason no campaign ribbon was issued—rather, the award was an "expeditionary" decoration.

The Echelon Front[]

The second front, following immediately on the heels of the first, was in defense of House Baratheon against Echelon. This was also a war of principle—the defense of friends. Echelon had the classiest DoW of the entire Dave War, merely entering in the defense of allies, and the resulting conflict was cordial, clean and gentlemanly. Echelon fought well but ultimately surrendered to HB.

The PPO/GPF/Argent Front[]

The Red Asses entered this war in protest of GPF and NEAT entering against LOSS inappropriately by treating a PIAT and ODP with PPO like an ODAP. The Red Asses also entered very late in the proceedings, mostly due to their efforts to acquire treaties with LOSS or TIO which would allow them to enter "legitimately". Failing that, the Red Asses created a ridiculous Surprise One Way WIKI-PIAT with LOSS, and used it as an excuse to "legitimately" enter the war. However, few targets were available, and those that were had been decimated by the TIO/DT counter. The Red Asses gave their targets every courtesy and did not take the opportunity to further destroy their infra needlessly.

However, another front was about to open: unbeknownst to the Red Asses, Argent had warned on the OWF that they would not treat anyone who "bandwagoned" on GPF favorably. Two days into the war, GPF called in their ally Argent to counter the Red Asses—an almost unheard of move by an alliance against a one man micro. Argent responded with a three nation stagger that likely would have brought ruin to the Red Asses had it not been for the surrender of NEAT, PPO, GPF and MHA 48 hours later. GPF attempted to classify the Red Asses as a rogue alliance, but Argent did not concur and granted the Red Asses peace. Later, Argent would dispute the fact that they entered on behalf of GPF, despite their OWF warning that they would, and IRC logs with GPF government stating both that the Red Asses would be treated as "bandwagoners" and that GPF had, in fact, requested Argent's help.

Post-Dave War[]

Post-Dave War, the Red Asses attempted some recruitment, but the efforts largely fell flat. Serendipity brought the nation of Vuklandia literally into the lap of the Red Asses in late November, 2012. At 104K NS, Vukland more than doubled the size of the alliance. This was a quality addition to the Red Asses, although unfortunately a short lived one: the war clouds were drawing dark on Planet Bob again, and Vuklandia felt he needed to face the coming storm with his old alliance mates at NPL. The war that came was not the war that people expected, however.

Kaskus-NSO War[]

The war that did come to Planet Bob was the Kaskus-NSO War, a conflict between the New Sith Order and SRA's protector Kaskus in December 2012. Domestic disturbances kept the Red Asses out of the war in the early going, and by the time they were available to help it was too late: the Sith had called in their allies NPO and Shangri-la, and the Red Asses would have been able to field only one nation in their NS tier—a suicide mission. The Red Asses supported Kaskus on the OWF where possible, but were unable to aid their protector in any meaningful way.

The Equilibrium War[]

Hoolorico

Walsh the Beloved proposed the above flag only half tongue in cheek when he was a member of Hooligans.

When the next great conflict came to Planet Bob, it was as vast in scope as it was predictable: every alliance that had ever been wronged by Doomhouse or the Complaints and Grievances Union was determined to get its revenge. Known as the Equilibrium War, it spread quickly, with the Equilibrium (war coalition) outnumbering the opposing Competence Coalition by a 3-1 margin. Eventually, the Hooligans, were drawn in again courtesy of the treaty web -- hearkening back to reasons that Walsh the Beloved had started the Screaming Red Asses to begin with. Again, Hooligans, whom Walsh had oft complained were "the Puerto Rico of CnG" (good enough to be cannon fodder, not good enough to be offerred full membership), were slated to bleed for the sins of the alliance they had orbited since the days of The United Front.

Prior to the entry of Hooligans, five of their membership left the alliance to join the Red Asses, to include most of Red Ass Commander Walsh the Beloved's closest comrades. They were not poached, and the assumption was made that their thoughts toward Hooligans' likely entry into the conflict mirrored Walsh the Beloved's. Predictably, the next day (February 21, 2013), in defense of GATO, the Hooligans went to war against R&R.

Talvisota War
Talvisota Image
Date Feburary 21 - March 2, 2013
Result
White Peace
Combatants
Rnrflag6
R&R
SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses
RIBBONS ISSUED
ribbon name
Talvisota War Ribbon

TIMELINE

MAIN WIKI PAGE: TALVISOTA WAR

The Talvisota War[]

After the Hooligans DoW, R&R began attacks on former Hooligan nations flying the Red Ass AA. Although there was no formal DoW by R&R, they acknowledged these attacks on the OWF in the Hooligans DoW thread, their leader, EgoFreaky,stating "Oh by the way, you seemed to have misplaced a few nations. Don't worry though, we found them for you :)".

Talvisota War Screen

Talvisota War Screen

R&R cited two reasons for attacking the Red Asses: first, they didn't recognize the sovereignty of the AA, believing that the SRA AA was simply a Hooligans AA under another name. This practice was not uncommon among the Competence Coalition side of the Equilibrium War, with many Non-Grata members flying the Poison Clan, SLCB and Team Rocket AA's that had long before merged into Non-Grata. Second, R&R feared that SRA might be simply providing a safe haven for Hooligans members to avoid war before returning to Hooligans to fight.

The Red Asses did not concur, pointing out that they had been a sovereign AA for over 230 days, and were not simply a Hooligans sub-AA, although founder Walsh the Beloved was a proud former Hooligan. SRA also felt the attacks were not politically or diplomatically justified, whether R&R's assumptions were true or not: no Hooligans member joined SRA after hostilities commenced between Hooligans and R&R, nor had any nation flying the Red Ass AA had returned to Hooligans prior to the R&R offensive against SRA. No nation in SRA had sent aid of any kind to Hooligans. The Red Ass position was that since no alliance-hopping, aid or other act of war had been committed against R&R by any SRA member, and no diplomacy had taken place to determine SRA's intentions, that the attacks by R&R against SRA members were unprovoked.

Walsh the Beloved made a diplomatic mission to R&R on the IRC on February 22, 2013, which resulted in a temporary suspension of attacks. However, R&R renewed their attacks over the following three days (although at no time was any SRA member who had been on the AA for more than 5 days attacked).

On February 26, 2013, the Screaming Red Asses formally recognized hostilities with R&R. The war was entitled Talvisota War due to its similarity to the 1939 war of the same name, in which the Soviet Union attacked a heavily outnumbered Finland pre-emptively, fearing they would provide safe haven for German forces.

Talvisota Attack

Red Ass P-47's strike a snowy R&R airfield during the Talvisota War

The Red Asses did not perceive their actions to be a part of the Equilibrium War nor did they consider themselves a part of the Competence Coalition; R&R concurred. Public opinion, however, was divided on the issue.

R&R's initial offensive targeted only those Red Asses who were former Hooligans and had been on the Red Ass AA for two days or less. After the initial failure of diplomacy and the official recognition of hostilities, there were only two members left of the SRA AA: Walsh the Beloved and Dan Sherratt. The other members had return to the Hooligans AA, or in some cases, none. At this point, both R&R and SRA recognized them as Hooligans. R&R responded to the SRA counter-offensive in a measured fashion, instead of using overwhelming force. Fighting was spirited but civil. Peace discussions were underway within two days of the official recognition of hostilities. An amicable cessation of hostilities was announced on March 2, 2013. In it, R&R agreed to cease attacks against all current members of the Screaming Red Ass alliance, and the Red Asses agreed that if any current member entered the Equilibrium War on the side of the "Competence Coalition" it would be considered an act of war against R&R. Ironically, this was the initial agreement proposed to R&R in the original diplomatic mission undertaken by Walsh the Beloved, but a technical glitch prevented it from being forwarded to R&R government.

The Great Expansion[]

SPATR AID

"The Great Expansion" describes the tremendous growth of SRA in membership, nation strength and foreign affairs in the wake of the Talvisota War. Immediately following Talvisota War, the Red Asses received rebuilding aid unexpectedly from some old friends in Swash Plates and Tail Rotors. Many months earlier, during the SPATR-NG Kerfuffle, Walsh the Beloved had designed their flag. After the Talvisota War, in gratitude, SPATR sent many millions of dollars in tech and cash in war rebuilding aid unbidden. These events led to the first ever alliance treaty for either alliance -- an ODAP entitled "The Air Assault Accords", a nod to the themes of both alliances.

SPATR also aided SRA in getting their flag in-game, which coincided with the great SRA expansion. SRA quickly moved to four members (it would have been 5 if not for the deletion of Dan Sherratt). The expansion was spearheaded by Xanth, whose recruiting efforts begat more members, and the collapse of Hooligans which netted a few more members. SRA broke 10 members and 400K NS in September 2013.

As 2013 wore on, the Red Asses continued to make foreign affairs moves; first signing a treaty with old Hooligans foe Pirates of the Parrot Order, and then another treaty with the United Republic of Nations, who they met and fit in with like "peas and carrots." Both treaties were ODAP, in keeping with the Red Ass charter. Later, the Red Asses even entered into a joint protectorate with PPO over the fledgling TEEN alliance.

All in all, the post-Talvisota period was a fruitful one for the Screaming Red Asses in terms of building alliance strength in numbers and treaty partners. The clouds of new global war were gathering, however, and eventually burst in the form of the Disorder War. As the Red Asses contemplated their possible role in this war with their new allies, a new and unexpected conflict sprang up.

Frozen Chosin War
FrozenChosinImage
Date November 4, 2013 - January 17, 2014
Result
White Peace
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Kaskus new flag
Kaskus

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir

Javahouse League
The Javahouse League

Sc flag
The Sandwich Confederation

Riot Society
Riot Society

RIBBONS ISSUED
Kashmir Campaign Ribbon

Kashmir Campaign Ribbon

Javahouse League Campaign Ribbon
Javahouse League Campaign Ribbon

Sandwich Confederation Campaign Ribbon
Sandwich Confederation Campaign Ribbon

Riot Society Campaign Ribbon

Riot Society Campaign Ribbon

TIMELINE


WAR STATS

Kaskus-SL War Data
MAIN WIKI PAGE: KASKUS-SL WAR

The Frozen Chosin War[]

On November 4, 2013, Red Ass ally Kaskus declared war on Shangri-La, setting off the Kaskus-SL War. The motivating factor for the Kaskus attack was Shangri-La entering the Kaskus-NSO War against Kaskus. Kaskus had been fighting the combined 12 million nation strength of New Sith Order and New Pacific Order for over a month, and as stated in their DoW Kaskus perceived Shangri-La's entry as unwarranted "piling-on". When the Disorder War broke out on Halloween 2013, Kaskus saw their chance for revenge due to Shangri-La's allies, NSO and NPO, being tied up in the swiftly expanding global war.

The Red Asses were not prepared to enter this fray, as they felt this was a one-on-one grudge match between Kaskus and Shangri-La. Shangri-La's allies did not see it this way, however. The Random Insanity Alliance declared war on Kaskus a mere hour and fourteen minutes after the initial Kaskus blitz. At 77 nations and nearly 3.5 million nation strength, RIA was larger than Kaskus and Shangri-La combined. Later, the Die Linke boc also entered en masse in support of Shangri-La as well.

Though it would be suicide, the Red Asses prepared to counter RIA in defense of their ally.

P-47 Attacks

Riot Society offensive being blunted by Red Ass close air support

Things changed on November 5, however, when Kashmir entered into the fray in support of their ally the New Sith Order. Although NSO was not involved in the Kaskus-SL conflict, Kashmir saw Kaskus' attack on NSO's ally SL as robbing NSO of help in the NpO-NSO war. NSO had publicly urged Kashmir keep Kaskus busy until NSO was free from the current global war and could join in. The Red asses, seeing a better match up and the possibility of taking some future pressure off their ally by aiding on this front, declared war on Kashmir on November 7. Because of the odds against them and the plethora of communist-themed alliances in the fray, the Red Asses began to refer to this as "The Frozen Chosin War" in reference to a famous battle in Korea at the Chosin Reservoir wherein the U.S. Marines were surrounded by communist forces.

Kashmir called in their allies The Javahouse League to counter The Red Asses on November 12 (tJL concurrently entered the NpO-NSO war against The Legion). The next day the Red Asses were again countered by The Sandwich Confederation, who joined The Javahouse League in the global war against Legion.

On November 27, Riot Society initiated hostilities against the Screaming Red Asses. The announcement was not made on the OWF, but reported to Walsh the Beloved on IRC.

After over a month of fighting, white peace was announced between Kaskus and the Red Asses and the Kashmir Coalition, although the wording of announcement itself was not without controversy.

Post-Frozen Chosin War[]

In the aftermath of the Frozen Chosin War, the Red Asses concentrated on rebuilding. There was a brief military altercation involving the Greater Jedi Order, but Xanth dealt with the matter and reduced the threat through military intervention. After providing it for three months, the Red Asses relinquished their protection over TEEN (along with PPO) on February 28, 2014. This was at TEEN's request, who felt they had outgrown the Red Asses, and selected the New Sith Order as their new protector. Within six months, TEEN was down to five members and floundering for survival.

In March of 2014, the Red Asses, who normally took an invite-only or "people who want to be a Red Ass will come to us" stance on recruitment, made efforts at a small recruiting drive. The drive had mixed success -- while the alliance reached a high of 16 members, there were incidents in which two of these recruits raided The Order Of The Black Rose in one case and NpO and TOP in another, resulting in one expulsion from the alliance. The Red Asses returned to their "quality not quantity" brand of recruiting, which garnered excellent results: March 2014 saw Dre4mwe4ver become a Red Ass, as well as the return of Lord Caparo to the Red Ass fold. Not only were they excellent additions to the alliance, but for the first time, the Red Asses cracked the Top 100 Alliances list. Within a few days the Red Asses were over 500,000 NS. Smurthwaite was recruited a few days later, and the Red Asses took advantage of the situation on the OWF, announcing both their new government and attainment of 600,000 NS on April 3, 2014.

Later that month the Red Asses signed an Amity and Cooperation Treaty with the Zulu alliance, whose leader, Ubuntu the Great, had shared good relations with Red Ass Commander Walsh the Beloved since Zulu's inception.

By mid June, 2014, the Red Asses had garnered 21 members and over 800,000 NS. Shortly thereafter, they announced the 3/5th Clause, essentially a one-way treaty with R&R in acknowledgement of shenanigans undertaken by some Hooligans members under the Red Ass banner during the course of the Talvisota War.

Into the Third Year[]

July 1, 2014 saw the Red Asses celebrating their second year anniversary at 25 members and over 900,000 NS. In their birthday announcement, Walsh the Beloved announced the Lawyers, Guns and Money Doctrine. This doctrine proclaimed that the previous Red Ass policy of only signing ODAP treaties would be abandoned, and that all treaties

1,000,000

The Red Asses reach 1,000,000 Nation Strength

would now specify that the Red Asses reserved the right to intervene politically, militarily and economically on behalf of treaty partners, who would have reciprocal rights. This doctrine was also applied retroactively to all existing Red Ass treaty partners. The doctrine did not represent a change in Red Ass treaty obligations, perceived or actual; it merely more accurately embodied the spirit of their treaty partnerships than any existing treaty template.

On July 26, 2014, the Red Asses hit a new milestone: 1,000,000 Nation Strength.

Red Asses Accept and Reject Political Influence[]

Admin changed the senate rules to now employ five senators, and Red Ass shakespeare became the first member of SRA to be elected to the Red Team senate. Shortly thereafter, NPO and Invicta spearheaded an effort entitled Union for Sphere Stability on Red. The Red Asses were invited to become a part of the union, which stipulated that NPO would receive three of the five senate seats, Invicta would be granted one, and UCR and the Red Asses would share the final seat. NPO argued that this would promote coordination, prevent an outside takeover, and ensure unity among the Red team. The Red Asses declined to sign, as the only outcome seemed to be that NPO was guaranteed a senate majority, and the outcomes being prevented by the treaty were not likely to transpire. In the OWF announcement of the treaty, there was some criticism of the Red Asses for not working with the rest of the Red sphere.

On August 27, 2014, the Red Asses and former foe Kashmir, who does not sign treaties of any sort, came to a "gentleman's agreement" to aid each other when possible. Thus SRA, one of the few true independents on Planet Bob, secured friendships with two other major independents: Kaskus and Kashmir.

War Returns to Planet Bob[]

After months of stagnant, pervasive peace, the long clam of Planet Bob was shattered in late September 2014 when Red Ass ally Kaskus declared war on MI6 over what was likely an internal GOONs mis-communication, sparking the Kaskus-MI6 War. Kaskus and MI6 tentatively agreed to limit the scope of the war, although numerous postings on the OWF led to antipathy between the Red Asses and MI6.

Although Kaskus did not request the Red Asses, that did not mean war did not find them: ex-MI6 member Mastabadey formed an alliance called Pee Wee's Playhouse and attacked Kaskus. The resulting Red Ass defense of their ally led to the Pee Wee War against both Pee Wee's Playhouse and their protector, Los Pollos Hermanos, led by long-time Xanth rival Rey the Great.

Pee Wee War
PEE WEE IMAGE
Date September 24, 2014 - October 11, 2014
Result
Victory
Combatants
Pee Wee's Playhouse Flag
Pee Wee's Playhouse


Flag of Los Pollos Hermanos
Los Pollos Hermanos

Financial Involvement
SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Minor Involvement
RIBBONS ISSUED
Pee Wee Campaign Ribbon

Pee Wee's Playhouse Campaign Ribbon

Los Pollos Hermanos Campaign Ribbon

Los Pollos Hermanos Campaign Ribbon

TIMELINE


WAR STATS

Pee Wee Stats
MAIN WIKI PAGE: PEE WEE WAR

The Pee Wee War[]

The Pee Wee War had a complicated and circuitous beginning. Near the onset of the Kaskus-MI6 War, Mastabadey (of the nation DanceAThon 2005) left RIA to create his own alliance, the one-man micro Pee Wee's Playhouse. Los Pollos Hermanos announced protection of the fledgling alliance. Shortly after doing so, Pee Wee's Playhouse attacked two Kaskus nations. In defense of Kaskus, a nation from Badlands, a SPATR protectorate, engaged Mastabadey.

In the meantime, two nations from the Screaming Red Asses, oblivious to both Pee Wee's Playhouse's attack on Kaskus and the LPH protectorate, also engaged Mastabadey in a "grudge raid", who responded with a declaration of war on Kaskus and SRA. LPH followed suit.

Some 35 hours later, the Red Ass Commander, Walsh the Beloved, returned from vacation to find the incident unfolding. He made an official policy declaration on the matter, in which he acknowledged that SRA's raid on what was a protected alliance was against policy and improper; however, the fact that Pee Wee's Playhouse had attacked Kaskus prior to the raid ensured that the action would have been sanctioned anyway, rendering the point moot. Walsh the Beloved offered LPH's Rey the Great three options:
1. Pee Wee's Playhouse makes peace with Kaskus, and SRA makes peace with all parties
2. Pee Wee's Playhouse continues war with Kaskus; SRA forgives LPH attacks as "raid protection" by an alliance unaware of attacks on Kaskus by its protectorate
3. LPH continues protection of Pee Wee's Playhouse in spitee of attacks on Kaskus

LPH Trophy

Red Ass ground troops display a war trophy after overrunning LPH positions in the Pee Wee War

Rey the Great decided on the third option, and the Red Asses formalized hostilities on September 28, 2014. Nations from Umbrella provided financial assistance to LPH during hostilities. Los Pollos Hermanos, hopelessly outnumbered in the conflict, began turtling shortly into hostilities. In exchange for peace, and in the absence of any communication from their protectorate, LPH agreed to cease protection of Pee Wee's Playhouse on October 5, 2014. No agreement between SRA and mastabadey was reached, and so the Red Asses continued to prosecute the war against them. By October 11, all Red Ass wars against Pee Wee's Playhouse had expired and SRA had no nations of small enough size to continue prosecuting the war.

Shortly after the war, both Rey and Masta deleted and their alliances disbanded, confirming Xanth's standing as "the one-time, two-time, three-time world champion" over Rey the Great.

Another Christmas, Another Global War[]

UN Dre4m

UN peacekeepers from Fidensgen take up defensive positions around the beleaguered Hotel Invicta during the Lulzist offensive of Winter 2014

The global war fuse that sputtered out during the FAN-UCR War and the Kaskus-MI6 War slowly but surely made it to the powder keg following DoomSquad's surprise attack on Invicta, sparking the Doom War. Unmoved by the CB, a molassas-like expansion and the fact that none of their were allies involved, it looked as if the Red Asses might sit this one out. Some Red Asses ghosted other alliances at war. Operations Officer Dre4mwe4ver raised diplomatic eyebrows when he joined Invicta in the role of UN Peacekeper. However, when SRA's newest ally Kashmir entered the war against SUN and NADC on November 18, 2014, SRA interest heightened. When Kashmir was countered by The Legion a week later, the situation for the Red asses crystallized, and the Red Asses declared war on Legion on November 29 in defense of their erstwhile foe Kashmir. .

Doom War
Luzist SuperCereal Image
Date November 29, 2014 - January 8, 2015
Result
Peace with terms
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir

Javahouse League
The Javahouse League

Anarchyinc
Anarchy Inc.

Flag of PPO
Pirates of the Parrot Order

Kaskus new flag
Kaskus

LegionFlag
The Legion

RIBBONS ISSUED
Legion Campaign Ribbon

Legion Campaign Ribbon


TIMELINE


WAR STATS

Doom War Stats
MAIN WIKI PAGE: Doom War

The Doom War[]

The Red Ass blitz was anything but a surprise to Legion -- several hours before the SRA DoW, concerned that the little-publicized nature of their "non-treaty" with Kashmir made it akin to a secret treaty, Walsh the Beloved

Legion War Logs

Walsh the Beloved notifies Legion government of SRA's intent to honor its pact with Kashmir

had informed Legion government of both the treaty and SRA's intent to honor it. Legion, who were also fighting Anarchy Inc. and The Javahouse League, did not pre-empt with this knowledge, letting the Red Asses come to them. Despite the multiple adversaries, the Legion enjoyed a sizable NS advantage.

Fuel FarmAss

Red Ass P-47's pound Legion targets in support of Kashmiri ground troops

Two weeks later, Red Ass allies PPO and Kaskus declared war on Legion in support of SRA. Although SRA was excited to fight alongside some of its allies for the first time, ultimately the war was a disappointment. First, although the Legion nations that did fight acquitted themselves well, as the war progressed through the second and third rounds Legion began to retract into peace mode, offering less and less targets.

Second, since the last war, the Red asses had tripled their membership, meaning there was a lot of members untested in the crucible of war. Research post-war found that the bulk of the war was fought by about a third of the alliance (some of whom were ghosts from allied alliances) due to warchest issues, lack of tenacity or unwillingness to follow orders. The Red Asses dealt more damage (613,214 NS) than they took (504,328 NS) for a 1.2:1 damage ratio, but it could have been much higher with more participation.

Third, in the waning stages of the war, Red Ass ally Kaskus declared war on fellow Red Ass ally PPO's MDP partner MHA. Xanth was forced to negotiate that minefield diplomatically.

After little more than a month of fighting, Legion and SUN reached White peace with the forces arrayed against them. Since there were terms attached, technically it wasn't truly white peace -- in any case, the war had ended and the Red Asses were ready to concentrate on rebuilding.

Post-Doom War[]

2015 began with the Red Asses ending another war and re-evaluating their alliance. Despite sometimes spotty performance in the Doom War, by most measures 2014 had been a successful year: despite the 400k loss in NS to Legion, the Red Asses had finished the year ranked 79th in the Amazing Sanction Race, up 35 places from the beginning of 2014. They had netted 14 new members and finished with a 4.11 alliance score, showing 211.36% growth for the year.

The post-Doom War period also brought on a spate of individual Red Asses inserting themselves into wars for individual political beliefs.

Rouge Legion Etrangère Ane

In mid-2015, the alliance Monsters, Inc. began a series of mass raids on various alliances, which in one case led to the Monsters, Inc.-SWF War. In May, while in merger talks with The Sovereign Order, talks went sideways, Mosnsters, Inc. felt insulted, and the merger fell through. Monsters, Inc. went to war with TSO, and reportedly were trying to extort tech to approve peace. This led to the Monsters, Inc.-TSO War. Some Red Asses fought with the TSO coalition against Monsters, Inc. under the AA Rouge Legion Etrangère Ane, or Red Ass Foreign Legion.

In late May 2015, drama hit the Brown sphere when Methrage of Limitless Nexus tried (and succeeded) in obtaining a senate seat by moving several allied nations to the Brown team to stack the vote. This was the catalyst for the III%-LN War.

On June 7, Red Ass Dre4mwe4ver, a key proponent and signatory of the Brown Sphere's Bruin Concinnity 2.0, attacked Methrage as part of the war, but remained on the SRA AA. Methrage was concerned that SRA was entering the war, and opened diplomatic channels. Walsh the Beloved, Red Ass Commander, assured Methrage that Dre4mwe4ver's involvement was not an official SRA response, but represented Dre4m and Dre4m only as an ally of the the Brown Sphere and a treaty signatory -- Dre4mwe4ver (and anyone who aided him) were on their own, as SRA as an entity had no interest in defending the brown sphere.

Methrage demanded SRA reign him in, and Walsh the Beloved issued a formal statement on the matter indicating that SRA did not consider itself at war with Limited Nexus, stating that Dre4mwe4ver should have left the AA, but no official alliance action would be taken to stop him from defending his Brown treaty obligations. Methrage insisted Dre4mwe4ver's actions represented SRA policy, and presented the Red Asses a deadline for Dre4mwe4ver's removal from the war or face eternal war (he later backed off the "eternal" portion of the ultimatum).

Dre4m War
Dre4m W4r
Date June 13, 2015 - End of Alliance
Result Walsh the Beloved deleted; SRA rebrands as Stripes
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir


Minor Involvement

  • Flying Sabres Flag Flying Sabres

Limitless Nexus Flag
Limitless Nexus

Monsters, Inc. Flag
Monsters, Inc.

CA Flag
Confederatio Æsir

Militaires Sans Frontières Flag
Militaires Sans Frontières


Minor Involvement

  • GCI Flag GCI
RIBBONS ISSUED
Legion Campaign Ribbon

Limitless Nexus Campaign Ribbon

Legion Campaign Ribbon
Monsters, Inc. Campaign Ribbon

Legion Campaign Ribbon
Confederatio Æsir Campaign Ribbon

Militaires_Sans_Frontières_Campaign
Militaires Sans Frontières Campaign Ribbon


TIMELINE


WAR STATS

Unavailable
MAIN WIKI PAGE: Dre4m War

When that ultimatum was ignored, Limited Nexus attacked SRA members Xrayben and Fruntz, who were not involved in the conflict, via military and spying . SRA responded in a limited fashion, attacking only those LN nations who were attacking SRA members uninvolved in the III%-LN conflict. (Notably, no Limited Nexus attacks were launched against FAN, who also had attacked Methrage in the III%=LN War.) In the meantime, diplomacy between the Methrage and Walsh the Beloved deteriorated as Methrage felt his alliance was being disrespected and SRA needed to be taught a lesson, and Walsh the Beloved felt that Methrage's view of diplomacy was to hurl repeated ultimatums and be generally unresponsive to reasoned discourse.

The Dre4m W4r[]

On June 13, the measured build-up of the war shifted gears suddenly when nations from LN ally Monsters, Inc. began a wide scale attack on the Red Asses at the request of Limitless Nexus. Peace was discussed and tentatively agreed on by the parties pending Walsh the Beloved's approval, who was unavailable. After considering the offer, he declined for the following reasons:

  • Immediately prior to offering peace, several Monsters, Inc members had attacked one more time, meaning several SRA members would have been attacked twice, been unable to respond, and forced to make peace
  • Monster's, Inc had attacked SRA when they were at DEFCON 5, and mobilizing the alliance for war had not only been expensive but used up valuable aid slots
  • Disenchantment with Methrage's diplomatic efforts

After the Red Ass counter-attack, Confederatio Æsir entered on behalf of Monsters, Inc. and Limitless Nexus.

On June 15 the Red Asses recognized hostilities with Limitless Nexus, Monsters, Inc. and Confederatio Æsir since the fighting had gone on without a declaration up until this point. Kashmir entered on behalf of the Red asses later that day. Nations from The Flying Sabres, a protectorate of Kashmir, and Pirates of the Parrot Order, a Red Ass ally, trickled in on one side. On the other, leadership from aNiMaLz began attacking Kashmir, who recognized a state of war with them.

Although the war began cordially enough with SRA's recognition of hostilities, in which Walsh the Beloved indicated his disappointment in the "fact that I must also recognize hostilities with Confederation Aesir, an alliance whom I have always had a soft spot for. However, they also have initiated hostilities against us and thus we shall make it formal here. I look forward to negotiating a peace with you." Cordiality soon faded, however, and the war soon took on a more bitter tone in OWF threads such as this and this.

Red Ass Flightline

Red Ass P-47's being armed for flights against Confederatio Æsir

For their part, Sigrun of Confederatio Æsir and Methrage of Limited Nexus felt that the Red Asses were conducting an aggressive war against them, that Walsh the Beloved had taunted Methrage and "peed in the face" of Sigrun, and was waging a war of lies on the OWF to turn public opinion against the "Limitless Coalition", eventually leading Sigrun to compare Walsh the Beloved to Nazi propagandist Josef Goebbels in public. Xanth of SRA and Sigrun also had an IRC conversation that rapidly deteriorated into invective.

For his part, Walsh the Beloved felt that Methrage and Sigrun were constantly making accusations without offering proof of their claims, although he invited them often to substantiate them. He also felt that they frequently misquoted him (Examples here, here and here), accused him of manipulating facts, and engaged in personal attacks on him in an effort to garner sympathy on the OWF. In response, Walsh the Beloved made heavy use of propaganda to illuminate his view of the "Limitless Coalition", which did little to alleviate the bitterness.

Monsters Attack

Monsters, Inc. aircraft burn on the ground under the guns of Red Ass P-47's

Vandelsand of the Guild of Calamitous Intent was attacked by SRA and PPO for sending overt war aid to Limitless Nexus. However, Walsh the Beloved announced a halt to the attacks becuase it appeared that the aid, even though offered after SRA and LN were involved in hostilities, were probably given to Methrage to fight III% and Vandelsand most likely was unaware that LN had attacked SRA.

On July 12, Kashmir declared war on Limitless Nexus. On July 16, Sigrun Vapneir of Confederatio Æsir contracted with Militaires Sans Frontières, a self-described "cooperative haven for rogue nations disillusioned with the state of affairs on Planet Bob," to attack the Screaming Red Asses.On August 1, the Red Asses expanded the war by attacking the Section 9 alliance, which was made up of Limitless Nexus war runners and others who had been sending aid to the "Limitless Coalition".

Monster Stats

By July 4, Monsters, Inc. had been serverly reduced in both NS and total nations

King Neptune of Monsters, Inc. began a peace talks conversation on July 6. Talk went smoothly until Smurthwaite of SRA made a drunken post indicating that one of the terms would include Methrage decommissioning his wonders, which was swiftly countermanded. Talks broke up when Lord Hitchcock of Monsters, Inc. and Methrage began deliberately and publicly touting Smuthwaite's terms as the real terms imposed by Walsh the Beloved, who responded by posting the content of the talks in public in an attempt to debunk this assertion.

A second round of peace talks was started by Methrage on July 25, but fell apart when Walsh the Beloved refused to include TCA as part of the process as Sigrun insisted, and well as the perception by SirWilliam of Kashmir and Walsh the Beloved that the "Limitless Coalition" was not on the same page and was resorting to talking about the war instead of peace terms.

The End of the Screaming Red Asses[]

Final Message

Walsh the Beloved's final message

On August 2, 2015, Red Ass Commander Walsh the Beloved was deleted unexpectedly by Admin. The timing could not have been worse: Dre4mwe4ver was also going inactive, as was Windsor, all in the same nation stregth range. Efforts were initiated to determine the nature of the ban, and it was determined that he ban would be, in effect, in perpetuity, both on the OWF and in game. There was no good solution and no options to exercise -- appeals would fall on deaf ears, and Walsh the Beloved refused to attempt to evade the ban. Executive Officer Xanth was installed as Red Ass Commander on an interim basis by Walsh the Beloved, who requested that Xanth forge a new alliance with its own theme and identity. Consequently, on August 5, 2015, the Screaming Red Asses announced their end of existence in an announcement that also declared the rebranding of it as Xanth's new alliance, Stripes.

Walsh exits CN

A New Beginning: The Reformation[]

On April 29, 2016, Walsh the Beloved's ban was lifted by the grace of Admin, and he wasted no time in re-forming the Screaming Red Asses. As it was the first time, the alliance began as a one-man micro, and once again, the alliance was born in battle, this time in defense of erstwhile allies Pirates of the Parrot Order order and Kashmir in the Bron-Yr-Aur Stomp. Kashmir had been set upon by all of Oculus in a dicey CB, and SRA announced a DoE/DoT/DoW (Declaration of Existence/Declaration of Treaties/Declaration of War) on May 1, 2016. Using the time-honored SRA tradition of treatying at alliances instead of with them, SRA declared treaties with both PPO and Kashmir (as well as reaffirming The 3/5ths Clause with R&R), and declared war on anyone attacking them.

The Bron-Yr-Aur Stomp[]

Bron-Yr-Aur Stomp
Bron-Yr-Aur Stomp (small)
Date May 1 - May 26, 2016
Result
Defeat
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir

Flag of PPO
PPO

Last Call Flag
Last Call

FARK Flag
Farkistan

War Flag of Nordreich
Nordreich

Ngwar
Non Grata

ANiMaLz
aNiMaLz

War flag of Sengoku
Sengoku

NpO Flag Modified
New Polar Order

NPObannerflagnew
New Pacific Order

Umbrella War Flag
Umbrella

RIBBONS ISSUED
Kashmir Campaign Ribbon

Farkistan Campaign Ribbon

Javahouse League Campaign Ribbon
Nordreich Campaign Ribbon

Sandwich Confederation Campaign Ribbon
Non Grata Campaign Ribbon

Riot Society Campaign Ribbon
aNiMaLz Campaign Ribbon

Kashmir Campaign Ribbon
Sengoku Campaign Ribbon

Javahouse League Campaign Ribbon
New Pacific Order Campaign Ribbon

Sandwich Confederation Campaign Ribbon
New Polar Order Campaign Ribbon

Riot Society Campaign Ribbon

Umbrella Campaign Ribbon

TIMELINE


WAR STATS

SRA DAMAGE DEALT: 10,334.45
SRA DAMAGE TAKEN: 9049.62
MAIN WIKI PAGE: BRON-YR-AUR STOMP

What began as another war between Limitless Nexus and Kashmir soon turned into something much larger, as Non Grata entered (ostensibly in defense of their protectorate Confederatio Aesir), soon to be joined by Polar and all of the Oculus Bloc. Most of Bob did not believe that NG and company was, in fact, defending "libertarian values", but rather had been looking for a chance at Kashmir for some time. The war turned into a classic curb stomp, with over 50 million NS arrayed against Kashmir. PPO and Last Call bravely entered into the meat grinder in defense of their ally, but to no avail. SRA also jumped in as a one-man micro, but had much less to lose as a re-rolled nation of low NS.

Walsh the Beloved did encounter two nuclear nations in his prosecution of the war, which made fighting difficult as his slots were filled. PPO sought peace and were granted it, with one term: PPO got immediate peace, but Oculus insisted Walsh the Beloved finish his ongoing wars. This played out in his favor, as once his nuclear opponent's war expired, he was able to do additional damage against his non-nuclear opponents.

Negotiations Logs

PPO got immediate peace, but someone it Oculus had a beef with Walsh the Beloved and demanded that he finish out his current wars.

SRA's participation in the Bron-Yr-Aur stomp ended when the final war expired on May 26, 2016. Kashmir got peace on May 29.

Damage

Nuclear attacks wreaked havoc on Washington's infrastructure, but the damage was easily repaired by an aid drop post-war.














Post-war Growth[]

After the Bron-Yr-Aur Stomp, old friend Xanth swiftly rejoined the reformed Red Asses. Although both were concerned with not stealing members from close friend PPO, SRA swiftly rose to nine members and almost 200K NS. By mid-June 2016 there were twelve members and the alliance was pushing 400K NS.

The Red Asses continued slow growth toward one million nation strength, and had some foreign affairs successes: treaties were signed with Jack Layton's new alliance, The Varangian Guard, as well as Master Hakai's new alliance Rebelling Against Dads. Walsh the Beloved stepped into other's affairs when the alliance of Scotland was threatened with disbandment by Monsters, Inc. after he found out that the reason for the disbandment was that MInc was afraid Scotland was going to join a bloc designed to counter MInc in the low tiers and that SRA and the Varangian Guard would be members. There were no such plans, Walsh the Beloved was unaware of the Scotland alliance prior to the incident, and Monsters, Inc. was NOT on the radar of the Red Asses. Walsh contacted Lord Hitchcock of MInc and told him so, and that he should release the constraints on Scotland, which Lord Hitchcock did. All was amicable, and the incident was forgotten by SRA.

SRA then began a slow slide into inactivity, unhelped by the state of Planet Bob, which was clearly dying. Tech was sold, improvements were bought, but the alliance was a reflection of the world. On September 25, 2016, the calm was shattered.

Abandoned-building-detroit-factory

Planet Bob was declining steadily as nations, alliances and activitywere reduced to levels heretofore unrealized in the planet's long and storied history. This situation compounded the difficulties faced by smaller alliances like The Screaming Red Asses.


The Monster Mash[]

Monster Mash
Monster Mash
Date September 25 - November 14, 2016
Result
Victory
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir

Varangian Guard Flag
Varangian Guard

Slapflag
SLAP

Mandarin's Banner
Federation of Cobra

Warfag2
Apocalypse Meow

Flag of SNX
SNX

Umbrella War Flag
Umbrella

Placeholder Flag
RAD

Atlas War
Atlas

Monsters, Inc. Flag
Monsters University

RIBBONS ISSUED
Monsters University Campaign Ribbon

Monsters University Campaign Ribbon


TIMELINE


WAR STATS

Unavailable
MAIN WIKI PAGE: Monster Mash

Thus began the Monster Mash. Initially the surprise blitz and SRA's inactivity paid off for the attackers, but the war would eventually involve a cavalcade of alliances stepping in to defend these two victims of unwarranted aggression.

P-47 Burns on Ground

Red Ass aircraft burn on the ground in the wake of the treacherous attack by Monsters University.

On September 25, 2016, the Varangian Guard and the Red Asses were simultaneously attacked without provocation or declaration of war by Monsters University, a rebranding of Monsters, Inc. that occurred in the wake of Lord Hitchcock's retirement. Though Hitchcock was gone, the Monsters' penchant for war without reason continued, ironically against the very alliance they once accused of setting up a bloc to counter such a move. Although there was no declaration, President Hardin eventually presented his CB to the OWF on Septemeber 28th:

"Monsters University picked Jack Layton and his alliance to hit before that happened. In his own words "Monsters University's reason for war is war itself", his past actions against us and friends did him no favors. I hope that explains it. As for SRA, we don't like them. The slap guy was sra government, and banned defended his dual membership, which I understand. Not that he's doing a great job, but I respect it. I hope this explains us breaking out of our neutrality shell :P"

On October 25, one month into the war, President Hardin of Monsters University finally posted a DoW on the Red Asses, although Red Ass Commander Walsh the Beloved took the brunt of their unprovoked assault, fighting five wars against nuclear and full-wondered nations. President Hardin also sent Walsh a private message indicating he was a specific target and had been sentenced to EZI.

Message from Hardin

Message to Walsh the Beloved from Monsters University leader President Hardin.

By mid-November, Monsters University was in disarray. Beaten soundly on the battlefield, they were out of warchest, out of ideas, out of luck and suing for peace. Roal36 had left them and was looking for a separate peace, President Hardin abandoned them for a second time while fighting SRA, and Lord Caparo fled to Non Grata. The end was nigh, and finally came on November 14 when they capitulated to the coalition arrayed against them and moved off the Brown Sphere. Their allies Sephiroth and the LPCN also disintegrated.

Post-Monster Mash[]

With the utter defeat of two-time foe Monsters, Inc. and the disintegration of Sephiroth, the Red Asses began a decline in activity and membership. There were a few bubbles of action that rose to the surface: in December, 2016, the Red Asses seemingly realized Walsh's longtime dream of a micro-bloc when they helped form Magnum Opus with Kashmir, Varangian Guard, COBRA and POSSE. However, internal squabbles betwixt POSSE and other members ended the bloc almost before the ink was dry on the treaty.

Other merges and alliances were proposed, none gained traction -- while the Red Asses recognized their inactive status, they also recognized their commitment to independence and sovereignty. Thus, by mid-April of 2017, their number stood at 11 members who tipped the scale just north of 600K NS.

The Nom De Jour War[]

Nom De Jour War
Nom Du Jour
Date August 3 - August 20, 2018
Result
Ceasefire
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Flag of PPO
PPO

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir

Mandarin's Banner
COBRA

Flag of Argent
Argent

Flag of the Siberian Tiger Alliance
STA

Flag of the Christian Coalition of Countries
CCC

FTW War
FTW

Nom Du Jour Flag
Cowboys/Boogie Nights/DGeneration X/et. al.
RIBBONS ISSUED
Monsters University Campaign Ribbon

Nom De Jour Campaign Ribbon


TIMELINE



WAR STATS

Unavailable
MAIN WIKI PAGE: Nom De Jour War

As the Red Asses, along with the rest of Planet Bob, continued their slow, inexorable decline into abject boredom and inactivity, the Umbrella alliance re-branded as Cowboys and began attacking alliances various and sundry to alleviate the planet-wide sense of ennui. By and large, the marauders were met with indifference and only a token smattering of resistance. Then, on August 3, 2018, the Pirates of the Parrot Order came into their sights. The Pirates were different: they had a backbone, and they fought back. They also had friends and allies willing to throw in with them, and they did. One by one, Kashmir, Argent, Last Call, the Christian Coalition of Countries and others, including the Screaming Red Asses, entered on the behalf of their Pirate brethren. The Nom De Jour coalition, so called because they continually changed their alliance name (from Cowboys to Boogie Nights to DGeneration X), wanted no part of it, and arranged for peace so they could continue attacking those who would not put up a fight.

This war was not a proud one for the Red Asses -- after the DoW, only Walsh the Beloved entered the fray, and his performance was, alas, not spectacular -- for the first time in his career, his interest was pulled from CN by RL concerns, and he failed to attack on two nights. One would be justified in wondering how long this could continue.

Lone Attacker

Walsh the Beloved peels off on a lonely solo mission against the hoardes of the Nom De Jour coalition

Post-Nom du Jour Era[]

The alliance had entered a new low as far as activity was concerned, and tech sellers became harder to come by, slowing growth even further. The Red Asses, who had ridden for so long with twelve core members, began seeing attrition as the Oculus block began asserting its will over Planet Bob. By early 2019, key members such as Asmodeus Knight had been claimed by other worlds, and the Red Asses were down to eight members and 426,000 NS, a far cry from the one million of their heyday.

Growth

Lack of reliable tech sellers and the general decay of CN both stunted growth and led to loss of members for the Screaming Red Asses

Over the course of 2018, longtime ally Kashmir had been involved in a few go-rounds with Freehold of The Wolves ((The FTW-Kashmir War and the Interstellar Wolf with Claws - COBRA war). The time and CB was never right for the entry of the Red Asses. In March of 2019, tensions again came to head between the two alliances. Kashmir's ally COBRA had performed a raid on an FTW protectorate, and the resulting botched diplomacy on both sides -- over basic FA terms such as what constitutes a round of war and when protection ended -- along with pre-existing and aforementioned bad blood, led to another war. Though the CB was ridiculous, the Red Asses were in a position to once again help their allies. Although known to Planet Bob as the Roll For Initiative - COBRA War, due to the almost unbelievable lack of diplomatic skills displayed by the two original belligerents, the Red Asses would come to know the conflict as the "WTF, FTW & COBRA?" War.

"WTF, FTW & COBRA?" War[]

"WTF, FTW & COBRA?" War
WTF War
Date April 4 - August 10, 2019
Result
Defeat
Combatants

SRA Flag War
Screaming Red Asses

Flag of Kashmir
Kashmir

Mandarin's Banner
COBRA

Dragonwolfnova
Freehold of The Wolves

Flag of Argent
Argent

RIBBONS ISSUED
FTW Campaign Ribbon

FTW Campaign Ribbon

Argent Campaign Ribbon
Argent Campaign Ribbon


TIMELINE


WAR STATS

FTW War Stats
MAIN WIKI PAGE: "WTF, FTW & COBRA?" War

Despite the utter ridiculousness of the prelude, the Red Asses entered the war against Freehold of the Wolves on April 4, 2019. All of the Roll For Initiative bloc had entered against the COBRA coalition previously (with the exception of GATO, whose extensive democratic procedures prolonged their entry), and so a counter was reasonably expected, although, at seven members, FTW had pleny of members to cover the Red Ass "blitz". Very surprisingly, it came on April 7 from RFI member Argent, a fellow ally of longtime SRA treaty Pirates of the Parrot Order.

As a seven-nation alliance, the Red Asses were certain to be outgunned, and due to their lack of activity, out-warchested. Their intial blitz was only two nations, and after the Argent counter many Red Ass nations were involved in 1 vs. 3 wars and quickly staggered. Red Ass icon Shakespeare was particularly rocked. The rest continued an uphill battle, out of nukes and staggered continuously. Walsh the Beloved and Xanth held their own against the odds, and Bullwinkle J Moose, after reeling initially, managed several offensive declares in one of the only bright spots for the Red Ass rank and file.

Attacking Wolves

Walsh the Beloved interdicts an FTW supply column in the late stages of the war

The Red Asses were also hurt in their war efforts by the changing landscape of Planet Bob -- with only 3000 nations remaining, mechanically, thanks to the +/- 250 rule, their mid-tier nations could be countered and staggered by much larger nations. This and fact that they were outnumbered meant that the mid-tier spent a large portion off the war out of nukes and being staggered by nations down-declaring.

The war drags on[]

By mid-May, it was clear that the Planet Bob exodus had removed most of the best Red Ass fighters. Only Walsh the Beloved, Xanth and Bullwinkle J Moose were coming close to a 1:1 damage given:damage taken. Given that they were fully staggered and could only attempt one nuclear attack per day (at one point Walsh the Beloved failed to land a nuke for an almost unfathomable 21 straight days), this ratio was slowly starting to creep away from them. Tasker74 was fighting, and finally made it to peace mode. Wilshire, late to enter the war and with zero fight in him once the war came to him, simply did not fight. RedArmy declared one war and then was unavailable for a few weeks, becoming a damage-sponge. When he finally returned, he was instructed to down-declare and inflict as much damage as possible since he still had a full compliment of nukes -- however, there was no follow-through, and he once again became an utter liability, doing literally zero damage to his opponents even though at full nuclear capacity. Soon, neither he nor his final opponent were attacking each other, even though both had nuclear weapons -- almost as if a secret truce had been arranged. Neither would respond to messages asking about the situation.

Peace talks and "good will"[]

About this time, terms were presented to the COBRA coalition by RFI (Kashmir and the Red Asses had already been informed they could walk away at any time with an admission of defeat and no re-entry -- Walsh the Beloved indicated that, as long as reasonable terms were not being refused by the COBRA Coalition, the Red Asses would be there until the end.) When the terms were presented, they were vintage: reps had been rare in recent years, and RFI wanted the COBRA Coalition to sell them 75,000 tech at below market rates, essentially making them into a tech farm for a period. Additionally, there were several "lulzy" terms vaguely reminiscent of the GOONs Mercy Board: TIE would have to rename their alliance X-Wing for a month, the flag of Argent would need to be flown for a month, a 1000-word story would have to be composed featuring RFI as D&D heroes and the COBRA coalition as Goblins, etc. RFI coalition leader Tevron indicted that he felt the forced tech deals would foster "good will" between the alliances, as would the lulzy terms.

The Cobra Coalition did not take the terms in the spirit of goodwill. A counter offer was made, absent tech deals, and summarily rejected by RFI, who countered with their original offer, slightly reduced. Despite being informed that the opposite was true, the claim of "good will" was again cited. Walsh the Beloved let the alliance know that the war would like continue for some time. At least by this time, everyone fighting was in peace mode except Walsh the Beloved and Xanth.

The enemy within[]

XANTH 420

The scene that confronted Walsh the Beloved on May 21. No warning was given; note buildup of NS immediately after joining the enemy coalition

Xanth Betrayal

As the war wore on, Xanth began voicing disappointment at being staggered, out of nukes, and the toll in money and tech, and indicated SRA needed to end the war soon. On May 21, while reviewing alliance stats, Walsh the Beloved noticed Xanth was no longer on the AA. Fearing he had deleted, Walsh searched and found that Xanth was still active, but had abandoned the alliance. Worse still, Xanth had actually applied to RFI's GATO -- he had left to join the enemy coalition. After seven years of working together (since the The Hooligans Civil War, where ironically, Xanth had wrongly believed Walsh the Beloved to be disloyal), Xanth joined the enemy without a word to Walsh the Beloved. (Later, Xanth would say "Nothing personal...I'm a dick... pulled a dick move.") Thus ended Xanth's legacy with the Screaming Red Asses, with his final words to Walsh the Beloved being "Then why are you still talking?"


The war continues... and finally, peace[]

MAY 23

Not included in these statistics are Xanth and Wilshire, neither of whom were members when these statistics were collected

Norwood Aid

Examples of the steady supply of war aid sent, unbidden, by old friends in the Norwood Coalition

.

In total, the war lasted five months. In the end, it bacame Walsh the Beloved's war.

FTW fought the SRA front well, and Walsh the Beloved was effectively staggered and in nuclear anarchy from day 2 until war's end. Negotiations were tedious -- Walsh himself made three efforts at pushing through the logjam, to no avail. In the end, when the war was looking to drag on until December, Walsh began OPERATION: UNDERGROUND RAILROAD (see Article III of the Charter) to move Red Asses to a different alliance (the not accidentally named McGuffin Alliance) and from there on to safe havens in longtime ally PPO. Walsh had determined to stay on the field of battle until a satisfactory peace had been concluded, and the Red Ass rank and file were simply not prepared for such a long-term conflict. They were terrible fighters, but had been loyal alliance members for years.

Often facing 3-1 odds, the war was a tough one for Walsh: after his initial stockpile of nuclear weapons was depleted, he began the tedious "buy one. try one" process of nuclear war against fully stocked nations -- a process that failed him during the early phases of the conflict, when he went 21 straight days without a successful offensive nuclear attack. During the course of the war he fought 27 nations and sustained 77 successful nuclear attacks upon his nation. In early July, he was reluctantly forced to turtle for a few rounds to conserve resources.

By late July, the pressure was beginning to show on FTW: the carousel of nations attacking Walsh dropped to one at a time, and often the attackers were not fully stocked with nukes when pressed against him. Later still, he would be attacked by nations who were not beaten down mid-tier but low tier nations pressed into service to maintain the stagger, and Walsh's performance improved as result of the evening of the odds. War aid came to him from the Norwood contingent - members of SPATR and Mongols began sending him aid unbidden, which was greatly appreciated, although starting the war with a 3 billion dollar warchest meant that money was never an issue, even with FTW relentlessly attempting to spy his finances.

On August 10, peace was achieved -- the COBRAlition admitted defeat without reparations. So ended the longest war in Red Ass history.

Argent War

Gun-camera footage of Red Ass P-47's repulsing an Argent air raid


Post War Era[]

Not only was the longest war in Red Ass history over, but, by and large, so were the Screaming Red Asses. Walsh the Beloved had shepherded the members off the AA, and, by design, was once again a one-man alliance. The Screaming Red Asses ended as they began: Walsh continued to fly the flag through 2020, before finally going inactive himself.

Appendices[]

Appendix 1: Charter[]


ARTICLE I -- Membership[]

Application to join the Screaming Red Asses is made on the appropriate thread on the forums. Prior to applying, members should ensure that they meet the following criteria:

  • Not a member of another alliance
  • Not at war with another alliance
  • Not a rogue.
  • Treat people respectfully in war and peace, and maintain a respectful presence on the forums, IRC and the OWF.

Members failing to meet or maintain these criteria will be denied acceptance/expelled from the alliance.

ARTICLE II -- Government[]

The Screaming Red Asses are a dictatorship, run by the Screaming Red Ass Commander. He will be assisted in governance by the Executive Officer, Operations Officer, Flight Leaders and the Top Kick. Government functions (FA, IA, MoD) will be delegated to these and other members as membership grows and as the Red Ass Commander sees fit.

ARTICLE III -- War[]

Members may NOT go to war without the express permission of the Red ass Commander.

When the Screaming Red asses go to war as an alliance, the entire alliance goes to war unless the tactical or strategic situation dictates otherwise. In any case, that decision will rest with the Red Ass Commander or his designee.

ARTICLE IV -- Raiding[]

The Screaming Red Asses do not endorse the practice of stealing tech from peaceful unprotected or unaligned nations. However, we recognize that limited engagements better prepare the alliance for war and provide valuable experience. Therefore, the Red Asses will allow raiding under very controlled circumstances. Raid targets must satisfy the following criteria:

  • Raid targets must be tech raiders themselves. By raiding for tech, nations are condoning the practice and tacitly open themselves up to the same practice.
  • Targets must be on the "None" AA or an unprotected AA.

All raid targets must be approved by government. Approval is secured by filling out a "Raid Request Form" on the forums to ensure the criteria are met..

ARTICLE V -- Foreign Policy[]

Red Ass treaties will conform to the Lawyers, Guns and Money Doctrine pronounced by the Red Ass Commander on July 1, 2014. These will most often be regarded as "mutual" on our end—however, we will not feel obligated fight a war for a meaningless CB not of our choosing, coalition-style warfare or for an ally that has made a foreign policy gaffe and is now paying the price. SRA may still fight such a war, but will not be obligated to.

ARTICLE VI -- Changes to Charter[]

See Article II.


Appendix 2: Awards, Decorations and Medals of the Screaming Red Asses[]


A guide to the Awards, Decorations and Medals of the Screaming Red Asses


Appendix 3: Index of Red Ass OWF Announcements[]



Appendix 4: Index of Former and Current Red Asses[]


  • Windsor
  • Tasker74
  • Jamison Beauregard
  • HotshotGG
  • ericsw123
  • SEptimoose
  • Chatterbox147
  • lionn5
  • Wartornplace
  • downsie
  • Hiro Nakara
  • River Song
  • Grim reaper22
  • Nuclear Toaster
  • Lord Caparo aka Razorade
  • ChairmanMeow
  • willww1
  • Xrayben
  • Chancellor Genroii
  • The Dark Emporer
  • Moriarty
  • Dan Sherratt
  • thisispep
  • happythepeppie
  • Chupi
  • Tyrian
  • Chong
  • Ki Prana Lewu
  • justtrentjohnson

Appendix 5: Growth Charts and Graphs[]

SCORENATIONSRANK

See also[]

Significant Red Team Alliances
CurrentNew Pacific Order
Under 20Union of Communist Republics
Defunct1stMICoJCOMECONCG(1)CG(2)CoRECrKrFPAFIRE(1)FIRE(2)GAROGCUGNOHelghan EmpireLBALSNLITHNevermoreNLFOceaniaRNURIOTSWF(2)StripesTCTDCTDPThessalyTMFTRCVox(2)UED(1)USFUSSR
MovedCATOInvictaNAC(2)OD-AllianceOINR&RScreaming Red AssesSocialist Workers Front(3)The Imperial Remnant
See alsoActive:
Defunct: Union for Sphere Stability on Red (USSR) • Agora AccordsLawyers, Guns and Money DoctrineMoldavi DoctrineRed DawnRevenge DoctrineSolidarity
Currently sanctioned alliances are denoted by Bold Italicized Font. Formerly sanctioned alliances are denoted by Bold Font.
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