|The Bughouse Pact|
I bring to you today an upgrade to an existing treaty with a group of people that makes it fun to be missing a few marbles, half a deck of cards, and all but two crayons in the carton. We've known this group of people since we were flying a different banner on a different team and they were kind enough to keep their treay with us when we returned to what we did best and went back home to Brown. It is with friendship and honour that I announce this treaty.The Bughouse Pact is a Mutual Defense Pact between the 57th Overlanders and the Random Insanity Alliance announced on February 15, 2009. It is an upgrade of the Peace, Intelligence and Aid Treaty entitled The Voices Told Me To.... This treaty was later upgraded to a non-chaining Mutual Defense and Optional Aggression Pact titled River's 57 Dancing Cacti on February 3, 2010.
—Mechanus, Captain of the 57th
Somewhere on the outskirts of Ariel
"Doctor, I don't think you quite understand. She's not taking to the medication like the others. There is something wrong with her."
Glancing up from his paperwork, an older gentleman in a blue smock adjusts his glasses before addressing those gathered in his office.
"I don't thing you all understand. She's not supposed to take to the medication like the rest of the shiong-mung duh kwong-run in this hellhole. She's not luh-suh. She's something....more. Now, if you have anything else to say I suggest you spit it out now before I decide to lock you all down there with the rest of our guests."
The small group nervously glanced at each other, faces covered with perspiration and worry. Mumbling to themselves they slowly shuffled out of the office and closed the door behind them. With a dull click the room fell silent and the gentleman returned to his papers.
Bouts of schizophrenia
Delusions of grandeur
Patient shows signs of advanced intelligence but unable to control random impulses resulting in frequent outbursts of violence and self-harm
Why is it that whenever they get anywhere close to making progress with this one weird things begin to happen. Sudden deaths of the staff, glass shatters randomly throughout the facility, patients howl in despair and fright, metal objects bend and bow uncontrollably. Why...why?!?
Getting up from his desk the gentleman makes his way to a small cabinet and opens a draw. Slides, x-rays, holo-reels, access cards. Reaching in the gentleman crabs a red access card and makes his way outside of his office. Turning to his right he looks down the hall and notices guards standing at attention to each side of a lone door. Looking to his left he sees his nurse at her desk.
"Nurse, please inform my staff that I wish to see them down at patient #145633's cell immediately."
Smiling, the gentleman makes his way towards the lone door at the end of the hall. As he makes his way he runs his hand through his greying hair and smiles. How long has it been since he was stationed here at the facility? How long has he been working on this special case? Reaching the door he produces his access card and swipes it before the reader then places his fingers upon the small screen next to it.
The door hisses open and the gentleman makes his way through listening to the door shut behind him. Before him lies a staircase and the sounds of people mumbling and rambling in the distance. The gentleman smiles as he makes his way downwards.
Today is going to be a good day, he thinks. A good day...
The Bughouse PactEdit
Run-tse duh shang-dee, ching dai-wuhtzo... make them stop! They're everywhere. Every city, every... every house, every room; they're all inside me! I can hear them all and they're saying... NOTHING! GET UP! Please, get up! Wuo-shang mayer, maysheen byen shr-to.
The members of Random Insanity Alliance (RIA) and the 57th Overlanders (the 57th) have long held each other in fuzzy blue robes with pictures of kittens and puppies on them. With the fading of the robes it is only fitting that a new robe be purchased in our relations and that our little voices be written in a book with brightly coloured crayon.
Let the world know that RIA and the 57th will eat at the lunch table together, except on the second Tuesday of every other fourth week of the month.
Article I. SovereigntyEdit
I am he as you are we as we are they and that has something to do with fractions
The 57th and RIA recognize each other as a real person unless the doctors and medication tell us otherwise in which case we'll just take more medication and make requests for time spent in the rubber room.
Article II. Non-AggressionEdit
Insert peg A into position D. If position D is in an irregular form then take slot B-2 and slide it into hole X. But be sure that lever D-a3 isn't in a parallel angle when the O-9 light is ignited.
Neither RIA nor the 57th shall make stabbing motions toward each other, nor encourage other groups or individuals to do so, child-friendly pointy objects or not. Neither RIA nor the 57th will condone sneaky letters or random bedroom raids against the other. If a member of either alliance freaks out in an act of violent insanity against the other than that member must be disciplined by their respective caretakers.
Members of RIA and the 57th will treat each other with medicated kindness and supervised respect, the exchange of insults and foul language (when not in a fit of a schizophrenic breakdown) will not be tolerated.
Article III. CooperationEdit
From here to the eyes and the ears of the 'Verse, that's my motto, or it might be if I start having a motto.
RIA and the 57th agree to cooperate with each other in the white rooms of diplomacy, intelligence, economy, and defense.
If either RIA or the 57th hear the doctors discussing anything that could in any way be constituted as another trip down to the operating room for an updated lobotomy it must be relayed through carrier rodent to the government of the alliance due for surgery.
Article IV. DefenseEdit
Someone ever tries to kill you, you try to kill 'em right back!
In the event that either RIA or the 57th are attacked by a patient from another part of the playground both alliances do hereby swear to provide, with loud noises and random wild gestures, full military, economic, and diplomatic support to the alliance under attack.
Both RIA and the 57th will work together with their imaginary friends to create overly complex blueprints at ways to get back at those that wanted to hurt them through stabby motions.
RIA and the 57th further agree to lend full diplomatic support to each other when attempting to secure a diplomatic resolution to a war or crisis, because the doctors said this and we were imitating them verbatim. So nyah!
This treaty defines an attack as any action by a foreign alliance that threatens or violates the sovereignty of either RIA or the 57th be it espionage, direct assault, or a number of other actions. More imitation on our part. We're getting better at this. Nyah!
Article V. CancellationEdit
So we'll integrate non-progressional evolution theory with God's creation of Eden. Eleven inherent metaphoric parallels already there. Eleven. Important number. Prime number. One goes into the house of eleven eleven times, but always comes out one. Noah's ark is a problem.
Should either RIA or the 57th feel they aren't painting the same picture of the same animal anymore then the one wanting to stop playing with the other has to write a story about why birds can't live with dogs at least 72 hours before they officially stop eating lunch at the same table and are released from their seat.
Signed for the 57th OverlandersEdit
- Mechanus, Captain
- Veneke, Lieutenant
- Holloweyes, Quartermaster
Signed for Random Insanity AllianceEdit
- Delta1212 - Triumvir if the Random Insanity Alliance, Demi-God of Maroon, Psychic Cupcake Overlord of the Cupcakery, Destroyer of Realities
- DrunkWino - Triumvir of Random Insanity, wielder of the Triforce of Drunk, and
<I'm a little tired, so insert witty remark here please.>
- Shadow - Triumvir of Random Insanity, The Ultimate Lifeform, Mystic Dragon Emperor of the Cheeselands, Puppetmaster of Chaos
- cctmsp13 - Head of Economics
- Agent Lemon - Head of Recruitment
- SWAT128 - Head of Foreign Affairs