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Official Flag of Bourbon

National Flag
Battle Flag of Bourbon of Bourbon
Battle Flag of Bourbon
"That's what life is, just another war to win. You ask no questions. Whatever it is you gotta do. You gotta go over it, under it, through it, around it, whatever it takes to do it. ''
National Anthem
"All Along the Watchtower"
Capital City Monticello
Official Language(s) English, Pig Latin
Established 11/30/2007
(6,080 days old)
Government Type Monarchy Monarchy
Alliance Random Insanity Alliance
Random Insanity Alliance
AllianceStatsIcon rankingsWorldIcon warIcon aidIcon spy
Nation Team Team: Maroon Maroon
Religion Voodoo Voodoo
Currency Shilling Shilling

Bourbon is a nation centered on the burial site of the influential political thinker, Thomas Jefferson but was founded on the shores of the Mississippi River, Lake Pontchartrain, and the Gulf of Mexico. King DrunkWino led the population to its current home after a violent conflict left the original home uninhabitable.

National Information[]

Bourbon is a medium sized, well developed, and aging nation with citizens primarily of Creole ethnicity. Its technology is first rate and its citizens marvel at the astonishing advancements within their nation. Its citizens pay extremely high taxes yet no one despises their government as a result. The citizens of Bourbon work diligently to produce Spices and Aluminum as tradable resources for their nation. It is a mostly neutral country when it comes to foreign affairs. It will usually only attack another nation if attacked first. It believes nuclear weapons are necessary for the security of its people. The military of Bourbon has been positioned at all border crossings and is arresting all drug traffickers and confiscating their product. Bourbon allows its citizens to protest their government but uses a strong police force to monitor things and arrest lawbreakers. It has an open border policy, but in order for immigrants to remain in the country they will have to become citizens first. Bourbon believes in the freedom of speech and feels that it is every citizen's right to speak freely about their government. The government gives foreign aid when it can, but looks to take care of its own people first. Bourbon will not make deals with another country that has a poor history of inhuman treatment of its citizens.


The nation of Bourbon was once a loose confederation of people living together in mostly anarchistic arrangement called River Town. That changed the day the Simbons led a brutal campaign against the citizens of River Town in an attempt to take control of the spice that was abundant in the region. The war was eventually won by the people of River town thanks to the emergence of DrunkWino who took command of River Towns military efforts and turned the tide against the Simbons.

River Town[]

The community of River Town was settled by a group of mercenaries who grew tired of the constant warfare of their profession. These warriors pooled the capital they had raised fighting wars and acts of privateering across the globe and settled a land near the Gulf of Mexico. This land proved to be rich in both aluminum and spices. The spices were especially sought after. The spice and the secret refining techniques established by the now citizens of River Town produced the worlds most sought after spice. In addition to the unmatched flavoring the spice provided, it also produced a mild aphrodisiac state in any that consumed it.

The peaceful existence of River Town lasted many generations. Without warning, however, a tribe of wanderers known only as the Simbons attacked River Town in a genocidal campaign to take control of the spice. The first attacks nearly wiped out the meager military forces of River Town who had become lazy over time. What followed was a brutal four months that saw River Town residents fighting for their very lives.

River town

River Town before The Spice War

The Spice War[]

The next few months were filled with terror for River Town. Capitalizing on their early gains, the Simbons took control of 3/4's of River Towns land and spice trade. The remaining defense forces of River Town fell back to defensive positions and hurriedly fortified what little they had left. The Simbons were not satisfied with what they had gained however. Daily attacks against River Town defenses further depleted what the survivors had left. To make matters worse, Simbon General Barakti had cut off access to the waterways that surrounded River Town, leaving the population trapped. As the attacks continued, the military of River Town was quickly reduced to a lone regiment, the 10th, The Saints. The 10th soon learned what the Simbons ultimate plans were, no less that then total enslavement and subsequent eradication of the residents of River Town.

The Legend of the Triforce of Drunk[]

Triforce of Drunk

The mystical Triforce of Drunk

As River Town resolved itself to defend itself to the last, an ancient relic was recovered that would bring salvation to River Town. Three days before the invasion, a man of River Town, who's name has been long forgotten, was sent on a quest to find the Triforce of Drunk by a mysterious old drunk. This man of River Town, who was later known as DrunkWino, was told that a dark time was coming and the Triforce was the land's only hope. Naturally, Wino didn't believe a word of it, until the old drunk reveled himself to be an ancient voodoo priest known as Garath. After a demonstration of Garath's power, Wino went to find the Triforce.

The Battle of Tchoupitoulous[]

Wino eventually emerged near River Town after retrieving the Triforce of Drunk. Using the power of the Triforce, which had embedded itself into Wino, he blasted a path through enemy lines and rendezvoused with elements of the 10th. Wino was able to rally the regiment, which at this point included every able bodied citizen of River Town, and took the offensive. The small outnumbered force met the enemy at The Battle of Tchoupitoulous. Wino was able to harness his power and literally became a one man army. Entering a state of Drunken Rage, the Wino led regiment utterly smashed the massed forces of the Simbons which saw Wino personally decapitate General Barakti at the during the fight with an empty bottle of bourbon. Simbon forces retreated from the battle, which marked the turning point of the war.

Bourbon shield

Unit Ensignia of The 10th Regiment

Finishing the Fight[]

General Wino

General Wino preparing for The Battle of The Ridge

With General Barakti's death, the Simbons were demoralized. Still, they held their ground. Wino, who was appointed General of the 10th by the survivors, wasted no time in taking the fight to the enemy. The next month saw violent combat but few casualties for the 10th. General Wino showed a keen strategic mind and the 10th had remembered their mercenary roots. The 10th were forced to implement a scorched earth policy in order to drive the Simbons from their positions. What followed was three months of lightning raids against enemy supply lines and what little command structure the Simbons had left. The Simbons refused to surrender and that suited the hardened Saints just fine. With their means to fight destroyed and the very spice they sought to control lost via the tactics of the 10th, the Simbons launched one final offensive near the region of The Ridge. The battle resulted in the 10th's ultimate victory, reducing the Simbons to two survivors. The two, a man and a woman were spared on the direct orders of General Wino who was quoted as saying "I will not lower myself to your level. Survive in this wasteland if you can. If you do, teach your future generations what happened here and should they seek revenge, I will erase your very existence forever."

The Crowning of a King evacuation of River Town[]

With the war finally won, the 10th and the remaining survivors of River Town now realized that in defending their lives, they had destroyed their home. It was at that moment, as the depression threatened to drive the people to madness, that General Wino appeared upon the shores of the Gulf of Mexico, where the survivors regrouped and gave the following speech:

Warriors of River Town, why do you despair? Have not each and every man, woman, and child among us stared in the face of death itself and spat in it's face? Have we not faced an enemy that brought us to the brink of annihilation? When I returned to you, you were preparing your last defense with each and every one of you were ready and willing to lay down your lives so that you would not live as a slave. Have you people finally exhausted your courage? Why do you weep at the prospect of life when you were resolved to death? Dry your eyes my people, for we shall live. River Town may be a barren wasteland, but WE are not. We who survived and triumphed against all odds will not let such a small thing defeat us no. For too long have we made our way without order. Too long have we neglected our duty to ourselves leaving our brothers and sisters to fend for their own selves. I tell you this now. Those who will follow me, I shall take up the mantle of King and led my mighty warriors to a new land. That new land we shall start anew and flourish as we never have before. We shall take our hard earned place in the world and so long as one of us draws breath, we shall never be defeated. Behold the ships behind me. They shall carry us to our new land. I will not command any who will not have me. If you wish to remain, you do so with the blessings of your brothers and sisters and the hope that we shall meet again. To all those who will follow, take what you have left and prepare yourselves. We set sail in two days time. We shall bury the memory of our beloved home, River Town, and journey to our new land, the land of Bourbon!


Pastimes and Heritage[]

(coming sometime)