The Gospel According to Mr. Flibble

The Gospel According to Mr. Flibble is an obscure codex allegedly revered by an inner caste of priests, recluses occupying a rather expansive system of caves in the centre of Minyeshi. Anthropologists and new age tourists alike remain baffled by the few scraps of the gospel's wisdom that have been revealed to the world at large, though that could be traced to the fevered state of the few apostates who have managed to escape the holy caves and reach more civilised lands. Unfortunately, the wetlands surrounding the caves seems wondrously fertile breeding ground for venomous frogmonkeys, and to this date no single apostate has survived more than 72 hours after being found.

There are no known surviving copies of the Gospel According to Mr. Flibble, but many centuries of painstaking research has managed to piece together some fragments into what adherents for unfathomable reasons refer to as the Psalter of Dibbley. By way of example, this quote is from Chapter 19 of the Gingham Convocation (third corrected edition):

5. When thou seest that—woe!— the King of the Potato People in all his glory approacheth in mischief, then pronounceth thou the Holy Utterance: 6. "Stokest thou mine clipper, Yea, verily doth I returneth by Boxing Day." 7. And thou shalt adore him, and thine answer shalt be in the recognition that, 8. "Oh, that is one splendid chap!" 9. And thuswise shalt thou be saveth from peril, henceforth and always, and nevermore shalt He Who Is Very Cross find thee.

The Gospel's intriguing name has occupied scholarly minds for as long as the work has been known. A current theory holds that Mr. is a contraction of Mysterious, though that hardly illuminates matters much.